Dave Barry on the Internet

A guy could have one major limb lying on the ground a full ten feet from the rest of his body, and he’d claim it was ‘just a sprain’.

I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting, possibly because the person who was supposed to provide them with a melody never showed up.

Admit it, sport-utility-vehicle owners! It’s shaped a little differently, but it’s a station wagon! And you do not drive it across rivers! You drive it across the Wal-Mart parking lot!

We’ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.

When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide Web….now even my cat has its own page.

Bill Clintonborn 1946

The NET is a waste of time, and that’s exactly what’s right about it.

William Gibsonborn 1948Name of an article he wrote for New York Times Magazine (14 July 1996)