Mark Twain on clever jabs

Dance like nobody’s watching; love like you’ve never been hurt. Sing like nobody’s listening; live like it’s heaven on earth.

A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

Winston Churchill1874–1965

Thus far, the reputed idiot Bush has graduated from Yale and Harvard, made a stack of cash in the oil industry, become the first consecutive-term governor of Texas, defeated a dual-term VP for the presidency, and led his party to [November 5th’s] extraordinary triumphs. Let his opponents keep calling him stupid; if they do, within five years Bush will be King of England, the Pope, and world Formula One motor racing champion.

Tim Blairborn 1965

• Politics

I love Thanksgiving. It’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.

Arnold Schwarzeneggerborn 1947

• Holidays