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EBErma Bombeck1927–1996

The quotations of

Erma Bombeck

American humorist and writer

1927–1996

11 quotes.

Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.
- Success
One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
- Children
There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression (1970)
- Christmas
What we’re really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?
- Thanksgiving
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
- Football
- Men
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
It is fast approaching the point where I don’t want to elect anyone stupid enough to want the job.
- Voting
There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, Yes, I’ve got dreams, of course I’ve got dreams. Then they put the box away and bring it out once in awhile to look in it, and yep, they’re still there.
- Motivation & Goals
A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
- Halloween
The grass is always greener over the septic tank.
Title of book (1976)
- Comedy

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