Robert E. Howard on comedy

Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.

A wolf was no less a wolf because a whim of chance caused him to run with the watch-dogs.

It is not pleasant to come upon Death in a lonely place at midnight.

Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Those are my principles. If you don’t like them I have others.

Groucho Marx1890–1977

A guy could have one major limb lying on the ground a full ten feet from the rest of his body, and he’d claim it was ‘just a sprain’.

Dave Barryborn 1947

• Dave Barry