Ogden Nash on youth

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets.

Middle age is when you’ve met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.
But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

George Washington, as a boy, was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth. He could not even lie.

Mark Twain1835–1910“Brief Biographical Sketch of George Washington”, The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, and Other Sketches (1867), ed. John Paul

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

Mark Twain1835–1910Autobiography of Mark Twain, Mark Twain Project edition, Volume 1 (2010), p. 210