Dave Barry on dancing

A guy could have one major limb lying on the ground a full ten feet from the rest of his body, and he’d claim it was ‘just a sprain’.

I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting, possibly because the person who was supposed to provide them with a melody never showed up.

Admit it, sport-utility-vehicle owners! It’s shaped a little differently, but it’s a station wagon! And you do not drive it across rivers! You drive it across the Wal-Mart parking lot!

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

George Bernard Shaw1856–1950

No sane man will dance.

Cicero107–43 BC

If people stand in a circle long enough, they’ll eventually begin to dance.

George Carlin1937–2008Napalm and Silly Putty (2001)

• Comedy