Quotes about comedy
1,001 quotes from 337 people
He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.
George Bernard Shaw1856–1950Major Barbara (1905)You can’t say civilization don’t advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
Will Rogers1879–1935The Autobiography of Will Rogers (1949)Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
Nikita Khrushchev1894–1971Comment on the construction of a bridge in Belgrade (22 August 1963), quoted in Chicago Tribune (22 August 1963) “Khrushchev Needles Peking”I believe most plain girls are virtuous because of the scarcity of opportunity to be otherwise.
Maya Angelou1928–2014I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (1969), Ch. 35Knowing that religion does not furnish grosser bigots than law, I expect little from old judges.
Thomas Jefferson1743–1826Letter to Thomas Cooper (1810)Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.
Ambrose Bierce1842–1914The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)H’aint we got all the fools in town on our side? And ain’t that a big enough majority in any town?
OATS — A grain which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people.
Samuel Johnson1709–1784A Dictionary of the English Language (1755)Quotation, n. The act of repeating erroneously the words of another. The words erroneously repeated.
Ambrose Bierce1842–1914The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)Do not do unto others as you would expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.
George Bernard Shaw1856–1950Maxims for Revolutionists (1903), #1They spell it “Vinci” and pronounce it “Vinchy”. Foreigners always spell better than they pronounce.
Mark Twain1835–1910The Innocents Abroad (1869), Ch. 19It was subtle of God to learn Greek when he wished to become an author – and not to learn it better.
Friedrich Nietzsche1844–1900Beyond Good and Evil (1886), Chapter IV, aphorism 121Like the British Constitution, she owes her success in practice to her inconsistencies in principle.
Thomas Hardy1840–1928The Hand of Ethelberta (1876), Ch. 9- Mark Twain1835–1910Mark Twain’s Notebook (1935), p. 379
- EDEdsger W. Dijkstra1930–2002How do we tell truths that might hurt? (1975)