Famously Said Random quote

Quotes about comedy

1,001 quotes from 337 people

Most readBy personPage 32 of 67

Forgetfulness, A gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
Ambrose Bierce1842–1914The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)
- Money
Wealth — Any income that is at least $100 more a year than the income of one’s wife’s sister’s husband.
H. L. Mencken1880–1956A Mencken Chrestomathy (1949)
- Money
She had an unequalled gift, especially pen in hand, of squeezing big mistakes into small opportunities.
Henry James1843–1916“Greville Fane”, from The Real Thing: and Other Tales (1893)
- Clever Jabs
- Failure
When you see yourself quoted in print and you’re sorry you said it, it suddenly becomes a misquotation.
Laurence J. Peter1919–1990Peter’s Quotations: Ideas for Our Time (1977), p. 418
- Quotations
One of television’s great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs.
Alfred Hitchcock1899–1980National Observer (15 August 1966).
- Television
Madam, I have been looking for a person who disliked gravy all my life; let us swear eternal friendship.
Sydney Smith1771–1845Lady Holland’s Memoir (1855), Vol. I, ch. 9, p. 307
- Friendship
Cockfighting has always been my idea of a great sport⁠— two armed entrées battling to see who’ll be dinner.
POP. J. O'Rourke1947–2022Holidays in Hell (1989)
What is an elegant woman? An elegant woman is a woman who despises you and who has no hair under her arms.
Salvador Dalí1904–1989In The Secret Life of Salvador Dalí—first publication in 1942
- Women
If Heaven had looked upon riches to be a valuable thing, it would not have given them to such a scoundrel.
Jonathan Swift1667–1745Letter to Miss Vanhomrigh (August 12, 1720)
- Clever Jabs
- Money
The true New Yorker secretly believes that people living anywhere else have to be, in some sense, kidding.
John Updike1932–2009The New Yorker (March 29, 1976)
Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Give a man a sub-prime fish loan and you’re in business, buddy.
Stephen Colbertborn 1964The Colbert Report (14 May 2008)
- Business
Vote, v. The instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
Ambrose Bierce1842–1914The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)
- Voting
Insurrection, n. An unsuccessful revolution. Disaffection’s failure to substitute misrule for bad government.
Ambrose Bierce1842–1914The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)
- Government
Mrs. Ballinger is one of the ladies who pursue Culture in bands, as though it were dangerous to meet it alone.
Edith Wharton1862–1937“Xingu” (1911), from Xingu and Other Stories (1916)
- Clever Jabs
Zeal, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. A passion that goeth before a sprawl.
Ambrose Bierce1842–1914The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)
- Youth