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Quotes about comedy

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Avoid at all costs that vile spew you see rotting in oil in screwtop jars. Too lazy to peel fresh? You don’t deserve to eat garlic.
Anthony Bourdain1956–2018Kitchen Confidential (2000)
- Food
Given a choice between being trapped on a desert island with a group of writers or a family of howler monkeys, I think I’d pick the monkeys. At least I could eat them.
Anthony Bourdain1956–2018The Nasty Bits (2006)
- Writing
I get offered so many bad movies. And they’re all raging queens or transvestites or Martians.
David Bowie1947–20161983 Comment, quoted in Halliwell’s Who’s Who in the Movies 15th Edition (2003) by Leslie Halliwell, p. 60
- Movies
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.
Wernher von Braun1912–1977“On Bureaucracy”, Chicago Sun Times (10 July 1958), as quoted in Gaither’s Dictionary of Scientific Quotations, 2nd edition (2012), by Carl C. Gaither and Alma E. Cavazos-Gaither, editors, p. 925
- Work
He was, and is yet most likely, the wearisomest self-righteous Pharisee that ever ransacked a Bible to rake the promises to himself and fling the curses to his neighbours.
Emily Brontë1818–1848Wuthering Heights (1847), Chapter VIn context
- Clever Jabs
- Religion
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
Mel Brooksborn 1926The 2,000 Year Old Man (1961)
I’ve been accused of vulgarity. I say that’s bullshit.
Mel Brooksborn 1926
- Talking
Critics must have been created on the seventh day. Because if God had created them on the first day, what on earth would they have done?
Goncourt brothersMarch 8, 1863; translation from Robert Baldick Dinner at Magny’s (London: Victor Gollancz, 1971) p. 77.
- Clever Jabs
As a woman, I find it very embarrassing to be in a meeting and realize I’m the only one in the room with balls.
Rita Mae Brownborn 1944
- Clever Jabs
- Women
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you.
Rita Mae Brownborn 1944
- Clever Jabs
If the world were a logical place, men would ride side saddle.
Rita Mae Brownborn 1944Sudden Death (1983)
- Men
Do not compute the totality of your poultry population until all the manifestations of incubation have been entirely completed.
William Jennings Bryan1860–1925
He knew less about women than he knew about the physics of hyperspace.
John Buchan1875–1940The House of the Four Winds (1935), Ch. XI
- Women
Every man at the bottom of his heart believes that he is a born detective.
John Buchan1875–1940The Power-House (1916), Ch. 2 “I First Hear Of Mr Andrew Lumley”
People are broad-minded. They’ll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn’t drive, there’s something wrong with him.
Art Buchwald1925–2007Have I Ever Lied to You? (1968).