Quotes about comedy
1,001 quotes from 337 people
Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in my bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.
Woody Allenborn 1935Standup Comic (1999)- Woody Allenborn 1935Side Effects (1980), “The UFO Menace”.
- Woody Allenborn 1935The Illustrated Woody Allen Reader (1993)
- Woody Allenborn 1935Standup Comic (1999)
When we played softball, I’d steal second base, feel guilty and go back.
I’m very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
Woody Allenborn 1935Standup Comic (1999)If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.
Woody Allenborn 1935Without Feathers (1975)- Woody Allenborn 1935The Woody Allen Companion (1993) edited by Stephen J. Spignesi, Ch. 7.
Can we actually “know” the universe? My God, it’s hard enough finding your way around in Chinatown.
Woody Allenborn 1935Getting Even (1971), “My Philosophy”- Woody Allenborn 1935Without Feathers (1975)
My breasts have had a brilliant career. I’ve just tagged along for the ride.
Pamela Andersonborn 1967Interview in The Mail on SundayDoes Mary Poppins have an orgasm? Does she go to the bathroom? I assure you, she does.
Julie Andrewsborn 1935The New York Times (14 March 1982)I believe most plain girls are virtuous because of the scarcity of opportunity to be otherwise.
Maya Angelou1928–2014I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (1969), Ch. 35
Christina Applegateborn 1971During an interview on Good Morning America about her recent mastectomy. (August 19, 2008)
Isaac Asimov1920–1992“Breeds There a Man…?” (p. 419)